Apocalyse Wow!

So I'm convinced the world is ending, that's nothing new. But I like to have fun with the idea and look for the silver lining. Now, the world could 'end' in many different ways: plague, nuclear war, zombies, whatever. But, if it happens, what I'm hoping for is the complete obliteration of human beings save for myself and maybe a few others, and the earth in relatively good condition (think The Quiet Earth or I Am Legend minus the weird zombie creatures).

I've got this great game I play with my Rickey sometimes where we decide what we would do if this situation happens, and here are my highlights...

Step 1. Steal a diesel and head toward Austin. On the way there, fill the truck with as many generators, batteries, foods, supplies and whatnot I might find on the way there. Also, raid every book store for all the 'how-to' books on practical things (building, cooking, crafting, etc) and whatever else looks cool.

Step 2. Pick a cool place to settle in. Maybe right downtown or on the campus (it's so pretty and it'd be right next to Toy Joy! which would still be rockin post-apocalypse). I'd hit up cool furniture and housing stores as well as art galleries and museums and pimp out my place.

Step 3. Just assume that during the above steps I/we managed to get food and shelter and basic needs and stuff all under control and are now at the point of killing time. And the awesome begins:

-gather up every piece of canvas and drop of paint (especially oil) and paint like the dickens.; especially huge Pollack sized pieces that I would continue to coat until the paint was 3 inches thick. Then I'd take them and hang them in the museum so that if later when aliens drop by the planet and investigate, I too will be considered a great artist.

-create and play in my Kid Cave.

-collect couture gowns, shoes, hats, shiny jewelry and Mac cosmetics and get fabulous on a daily basis (I've loved dressing up since I was kid, and still would if people wouldn't look at me funny).

-on that same note, I would take all the money out of banks and turn it into origami and make giant wings out of it. And then adorn them with diamonds and emeralds and goodies.

-go hunting with semi-automatic weapons in departments filled with mannequins and also take a baseball bat to BMW's, Lexus' and Porsches.

-figure out the whole self-developing process of film and go to town with my Nikon.

-find a Chevelle and drive around in circles on the highway like that one commercial.

-should there be a group of us, I'd insist on organizing giant RPG versions of Zombies! and D&D and whatever else would involve us running around and attacking each other for funsies. Also elaborate games of capture the flag and life-sized Battleship and Chess. Oh and lots of paintball.

-set fire to those creepy all-houses-look-the-same subdivisions and make smores while I'm at it.

-paint huge fun murals on all the other buildings I do like.

-drop parachute action figures from the tops of high-rises. It'd be great if I could find the Ninja Turtle ones I had when I was a kid.

-plant crazy flower gardens in run down cars and little kiosks and fountains that no longer flowed.

-play Frisbee with those super skinny laptops. Or maybe not so much Frisbee, but throwing them really hard and then watching them shatter on concrete.

-organize huge parades of wind up toys and remote-controlled cars and other gadgets.

-re-learned to roller-skate and go everywhere.

So yeah. That's my plan. I'm sure there are other things I'd do but this is all for now. Bring on the apocalypse! You know you want it...

Theatrical Casting: The Breakfast Club

The other day I saw some Hayden Panettiere and she just reminded me of those bitchy, preppy girls from high school, and I started thinking that there were probably little cliques in Hollywood, especially young Hollywood. Then I thought how great would it be if a bunch of random stars were stuck together in a Breakfast Club type situation, but not a movie remake (cause no one needs to remake that movie, even though I'm sure it's just a matter of time before someone does). And then I was hanging out with my friend Andy and he mentioned how he would love to see a theatrical version of The Breakfast Club, and I was like, Of Course!

So here are my thoughts on who should be cast in this fictional, let's say Off-Broadway, production...

Zac Efron as Andrew Clark

Yeah, he's not super jocky, but he did play a basketball star in all three of the High School Musical movies, so I think he can pull it off. I'm not sure about his acting chops when it comes to the breakdown scene, but if he can act as well as he can dance and sing, I think he's all set. Plus, we all know he's super dreamy and he's totally the kind of guy that you'd love to see the weird, misunderstood girl hook up with.

Hayden Panettiere as Claire Standish

I really like Hayden in Remember the Titans and Malcolm in the Middle; she was super cute! So I thought for sure she would to grow to be a spunky, cool teen star. But instead she became the icon for cheerleader perfection. Bleh. But I still think she's got some good acting stuff rolling around in her, so she seems like the perfect candidate to play the over-burdened princess who falls for the criminal.

Michael Cera as Brian Johnson

He's everyone's favorite dork, ever since Arrested Development. And unfortunately he seems to be type cast all over the place (except for Scott Pilgrim, I just don't get that). But I think he would be great in this role, because he's normally so awkward that it's really comedic, yet this nerd is more tame, more quiet and very introspective. He basically at the point of suicide and he's really not in the mood for joking. I think it would be fantastic.

Kat Dennings as Allison Reynolds

Kat Dennings just seems really cool, and all the roles I 've seen her in so far (except maybe The House Bunny) are really cool and a little different. She's also quite hot in an off-beaten path kinda way. She could totally go from grungy weird girl to preppy hottie in the course of a couple of hours.

Channing Tatum as John Bender

While Tatum might be better known for his roles in Step Up and Fighting (and soon G.I. Joe), he was really fantastic in A Guide to Recognizing Your Saints, so don't think I'm crazy for picking him for such an intense role. But he's got the bulk to pull of being a tough bad guy/bully, yet he's handsome enough to be lovable and let our hearts go out to him. He just needs to be scruffed up a bit and he's all set.

Alec Baldwin as Richard Vernon

Baldwin has become known as a great comedy actor thanks to his appearances on SNL, 30 Rock and random films, but back in the day he was a serious actor, so he's got the best of both worlds. The original Principal had that whole wirey, squirrely look, so Baldwin might have to lose a few pounds to really embody the role, or he might just take it some other direction and be super awesome on his own.

Chris Meloni as Carl

If you've seen Wet Hot American Summer, you totally get this and know how awesome it would be. If you haven't, go watch it now.

So yeah. Let that roll around in your head for a minute. Think about the dance sequence, and the confession scene, and the Principal stuff. How awesome would that be?

Blockbuster Blowout!

I was going through Entertainment Weekly's Summer Movie Issue, and I realized that there are a lot of movies coming out that I'm pretty psyched for, so I narrowed down the list to the 10 that I would love to see in theaters. I meant to get this up sooner, but that didn't happen, so I've already seen one...Oh well.

Star Trek- I saw this over the weekend and it was fantastic! I was really hoping it would be a fun, romping good sci-fi flick and it totally was. I highly recommend checking this out in theaters if you can.

Drag Me to Hell-I love Sam Raimi. And I'm not big on the Spiderman movies. So his return to over-the-top gore and horror and goodness has gotten me very excited. And Allison Lohman has done well in everything I've seen from her, so this has to be awesome.

Up- Pixar. 3-D. What else do you need?

Transformers:Revenge of the Fallen-The first Transformers movie was very exciting despite the fact that it didn't make any sense and was highly illogical. But this one has even more robots! And they're bigger! And they beat they crap out of each other and all kinds of other stuff!

Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince-I don't read the books, but I really enjoy the movies. They have cute and wacky creatures, magic and everyone's British. And as they've become increasingly darker I've liked them more and more. So I'll be there, and I might even go in costume.
(these are the less 'blockbuster-y' movies that I want to check out...)

The Hangover-You all know this trailer is hilarious, so no one should hesitate to go see it. Bradley Cooper has been popping up all over the place for the past few years and everything he does is great. I'm a little iffy on the whole Mike Tyson thing, but between Andy from the office and Zack Galikfishiohojnkjiis (or whatever), I can let it slip.

Moon-This one might be hard to see as it's an independent release so I might find it somewhere in Manhattan if I'm lucky and really diligent. But it looks creepy and dark and that mixed with Sam Rockwell's inherent wackiness/lovability, it seems fantastic. It also seems like the kind of thing that will be huge post-DVD release, which is another reason I'd want to see it on the big screen.

(500) Days of Summer-I love Zooey Deschanel. She kinda plays the same character all the time, but I don't care and I will watch anything she's in. And I'm not always a sucker for romance stories, but this one looks really nice and special and different.

Funny People-The first trailer I saw made me tear up. I love all three leads, Apatow is a genius, his kids are precious and hilarious, and I keep hearing 'Oscar Buzz' about it. I can't wait.

Inglorious Basterds-It's a really late summer movie, but it counts. I'll see whatever Taratino puts out, no matter what it is. But I love Brad Pitt (not Benjamin Button Brad Pitt, but Fight Club and Ocean's 11 Brad Pitt) and I'm all for scalping Nazis...

So yeah. I'd love to see all of these in theaters. It probably won't happen, and instead I'm sure I'll get dragged to some other movies, but almost all summer blockbusters are fun to see in theaters.

I Fixed a Wicket!

So I LOVE Mighty Muggs. I think they are super cute. And I LOVE Ewoks (Hurley can suck it). So it blew my mind when I walked in a comic book store and saw a Wicket Mighty Mugg. So I got it, took it home, and I realized that it wasn't quite right. It needed ears! So I gave it to them!

SEE!&

I'm very proud and really happy.

My Awesome Kid Cave

So recently, my friend TJ saw the movie I Love You, Man (which is an awesome film and I highly recommend it) and he's become fixated on having his own man cave (it's a thing from the movie if you couldn't tell). Anyways, I think the idea of having a man cave is kind of lame, at least the kind like back on Home Improvement where it's a escape-your-wife-cause-she-just-doesn't-get-you type of room. And my house is already covered in toys and posters and comics so I don't see the need for a man cave (well, I don't see how Rickey would need a man cave cause we already live in one). But I got to thinking about it and I wouldn't mind having my own room where I keep all my stuff that people would think I was crazy for having and I can only let those who I deem worthy come inside.

So, I've created my own Kid Cave.

I'm a girl, so I obviously can't have a 'man cave', and I'm not a girly-girl so I can't have some weird spa-bullshit room. But I love toys and I love playing and I'm an only child so I like being alone with my stuff, cause other people just don't play right. So I need my own kick-ass room. To start off, it would be super bright and colorful with shelves of toys and fun posters and murals all over the walls. You can't tell that from my drawing above, but just imagine it. And you can see the drawing better if you click on it and pull it up in another window. I'll go over the specifics here:

~Starting with the basics: I'd of course have a TV/Entertainment center stocked with all my favorite re-watchable movies, a Wii, X-Box 360, PS3 and whatever other cool gaming thing I can find. And I'd have giant papasan chair parked in front of the whole thing (I like to call them popozao chairs as you might notice in the labeling).

~Next to that is a camera set up because I really like taking pictures of toys, especially all close-up and stuff. So I'd have little sets and lights and backdrops and it would be fantastic.

~Adjacent to that is something I want whether I ever have this room or not, and it would be all the Playmobil figures and playsets I've ever wanted. Playmobil has been my favorite toy line since I was 3 and after having worked in 3 different toy stores where it was sold, I'm an even bigger fan than I was when I was little. Some of the pieces that I must have would be the mansion (I want it sooo bad!), a castle, pirate stuff (as pictured) and the list just keeps on going...

~Behind that would be my crafting table (with a great view of the TV). There are bins all along the wall that would have all my crap: crayons, coloring books, shrink dink stuff, origami, wings making stuff and on and on.

~Next to the craft bins would be my dress-up closet. I love dress-up. Get off my back. I work at a costume company and I love Halloween and I make fairy wings and go to Ren Faire, so my dressing-up should come as a surprise to no one.

~In front of that would be a little book nook that I'd find some cool way to enclose, and then inside I've have some super awesome rug with all my stuffed animals (they're bad-ass stuffed animals like Cthulu and Ugly Dolls so it's okay) and wacky pillows and blankets. It would be for reading and drawing and playing my Nintendo DS.

~ Over in the bottom left corner, there's an extra TV up on the wall and it would be wired to the main TV so I can see whatever I'm watching from anywhere in the room.

~ The left wall would be a solid white wall where I could paint whenever I felt like it. We had one of these back when I was in theatre and it's super fun. You just paint and go and you're not trying to create an individual piece so it ends up being cathartic.

~And then of course, there would be my Lego pit, filled with all the Legos I could find. This would probably be the thing that I would actually have to let people in to play with, cause I know it would be cruel to deny any child of my generation the chance to play with that many Legos. I would have buckets of just plain Legos for regular building, but I'd also love to have stuff like the Batman and Indiana Jones Legos. It would be swell.

~Next to the awesomeness would be the most girly thing in the room. Sorry boys. But I realized while working in the doll department at FAO Schwarz, that I really still love to dress up Barbies and other dolls (here's looking at you Tonner dolls). So I think it would be cool to have shelf to display them on (maybe with those fancy dressing room lights), and a little table where all the clothes and accessories would be kept and their hair could be done and all that jazz. Ladies, if you ask nicely, I might let you in for this.

~And last but not least, would be a computer used for nothing but gaming. Specifically The Sims, Sim City, and Roller Coaster Tycoon. Those are all games that I can sit for days and play, which is why none of them are loaded on my current computer.

So yeah. That's my dream room. And if it exists when I have kids, they soooo don't get to go in, cause they'll totally mess everything up.

Umbrella Academy Casting

I'm in the middle of reading the second series of The Umbrella Academy, and it's definitely the kind of book that I see being optioned into a movie in the near future. So I thought I'd throw my two cents in on who to cast before that happens. When I first heard about the book, I was very skeptical. While I enjoyed The Black Parade by My Chemical Romance, the James Jean cover and seemingly gothic premise screamed god-awful emo crap. But then I was pleasantly surprised! Gabriel Ba's artwork and the Royal Tenenbaums-meets-Hellboy team with Doom Patrol-esque problems are heaven for me.

Spaceboy
James Van der Beek

I was never a fan of Dawson's Creek, but between Varsity Blues and Rules of Attraction, I'm a huge Van der Beek fan. I wish he was in more stuff, and I think he could do a great job as the cocky, heroic, know-it-all Spaceboy. He's also got a strong enough jaw line to pull off a heavy presence while still sporting the whole mostly gorilla-bodied thing.


Kraken
Josh Harnett

It seems like there's a lot of ways to cast the Kraken, what with him being the sassy rogue and all. But I think that Hartnett has just enough pretty with a little bit of edge mixed in. I love him in everything from 40 Days and 40 Nights to Luck Number Slevin. But I think it's his drug-dealing ways from The Faculty that really seals the deal for me.


Rumor
Julia Stiles

The Rumor is supposed to ooze feminine wiles, while at the same time being very smart and calculating. Stiles is hot enough to pull it off, but she also seems like she might actually be smart, which is always a plus. I also think she has enough screen presence to shine through even after she gets silenced.



Seance`
Michael Showalter

The Seance` seems like he was the kind of kid who was super-nerdy and outcast, but, because of his abilities, would've been strangely cocky. I'm not too sure about Showalter's acting chops, but he is damn funny and has some real sass, which I think is a definite necessity. Also, the Seance` has a very prominent nose, and Showalter's nose would totally fit the bill.


Number Five
Rory Culkin (?)

The main reason I didn't cast the child versions of the siblings is because as soon as you find a kid the right age with great acting skills, they're suddenly all grown up (did you know the kid from Love Actually is 19?). Anyways, for Number Five, I would go with someone who had that whole Rory Culkin in Signs thing. Or maybe Elijah Wood in The Good Son.

The Horror

Guy Pearce

We haven't really learned much about the Horror's personality, but it seems like he might be somewhat somber and brooding (you know that whole demons-live-inside-me thing). So my default go-to guy for that is Guy Pearce. He's awesome in everything he does. And he's so pretty. What could go wrong?


The White Violin
Judy Greer

I think the obvious casting for the White Violin would be Selma Blair, but I wanted to think outside the norm. And Judy Greer has always entertained me, both in dramatic and comedic roles. She's also just odd-looking enough to really embody that whole out-of-place thing, but thin and angular enough to pull off the very stylized look of the Violin.

The Monocle
Bill Nighy

Really, any thin, pointy, mad-scientist-looking old guy would work, but I love Bill Nighy. I love him in everything he does, but his role as the un-patriarchal dad in Shaun of the Dead really makes him perfect to lead this little clan of odd-balls. I would also pitch David Bowie for the role.


Dr. Pogo
Dominic West

I imagine Dr. Pogo to be British and coy, and even though West plays an American on The Wire, that stellar show made me fall in love with this brooding actor. If a talking chimp has to be my mentor, I totally want him to be McNulty.



Mrs. Hargreeves
Megan Mullally

Mom is another character who hasn't shown up a whole lot, but I imagine that she is always a super-perfect-50's-housewife with a robot twist. Mullally is mom-looking enough and she's funny and odd, which just kind of goes along with the crew. I think she would bring a little more character to the role than other candidates might.

Adventures in Dorkville.

As illustrated in the image above, I used to look like a huge dork. I've discovered that this is true for a lot of people in my age group (we can all thank the 80's for that), and though a lot of people seem to hide their former fashion misgivings, I LOVE mine. When I was a kid, my mom would let me pick out my own clothes and put together my own outfits, which granted, didn't always work out so well, but at least I got to try. As I got older, I'd look back at pictures of myself, and for a long time, I was totally ashamed of looking like a damn fool, but I learned from it, and I realized what worked and what didn't.

So now that I'm a semi-grown up with a decent sense of the world, I love looking back on these pictures because it's fraking hilarious. I totally thought that I looked cool, which is great, cause I'm barely cool now. But I thought I was, and even though I had almost no friends and kids were mean to me and I got made fun of, I still did my own thing to the best of my ability. And because of all that, I really think it helped me grow.

That being said, I think ALL children should look ridiculous. Not because it's funny or mean, but because their kids. They should have fun, and be allowed to wear neon green socks with jellys or a pink tutu with a raincoat or whatever. That way, they too can appreciate the fact that once they're grown, they know how to dress and what's cool to them, rather than what their mom or the TV tells them. However, more and more I'm seeing kids that look cooler than most adults. And I'm not even talking about teenagers, I'm walking about pre-teens or "tweens," and they're looking older and cooler by the minute. What the hell? How are they ever gonna know that ridiculous awkwardness and the gratification that comes from conquering it if they all looked like they stepped right out of the Disney channel?

I'm not saying that I want kids to suffer and be dorks because I'm bitter or crazy or whatnot, but we grow and learn from our mistakes. And during that awkward pre-teen, early teen stage, we really start to develop our identities and how we fit into a group and society as a whole. So if all these kids are walking around looking like GAP Kid commercials, who will they become? When they look back on pictures of themselves looking cute and awesome at the age of 10, what will they learn? Will they learn anything? I am, as always, completely convinced that society is doomed, so having a generation of Stepford Children walking around is not helping me be any less paranoid. So all I can say to my peers is to treasure the awesome awfulness that was your childhood imagery, and please, please, whenever you have kids, let them look like a damn fool for the betterment of society.