Seven Soldiers of Victory Casting

So, Rickey's been wanting me to read this series FOREVER and I finally got around to it. I'm not big into superhero comics, but I love Grant Morrison, and though I didn't always understand Seven Soldiers, I totally dug it.

So of course as soon as I finished it, I had to cast it in my head. Plus, I can't imagine this ever making it's way to the big screen, so I'm sure my choices are safe from future disappointment.

Lauren Graham as Zatanna

I never watched Gilmore Girls, but I've every other time I've seen Lauren Graham in something, she's fantastic. She's 43, but doesn't look it at all, and she's got that gorgeous but down-to-the-earth thing going on. She's got a smartness and sassiness to her that also makes her sexy, and I think that's exactly what it would take to play Zatanna. Unfortunately a studio would just plop a Megan Fox-type actress into this role, but that would such a waste of a great character.

Thomas Sangster as Klarion the Witch Boy

I'd never even heard of Klarion before, but he turned out to be my favorite character from the series. The backstory of that plotline is amazing and creepy, and the whole puritan-witch thing is fabulous. Plus he has an orange cat, and that is something I'm very biased to. So to play him, an actor would have to be able to be mischievous and dark, but also naive and a bit overwhelmed, and look a bit creepy. So there's the kid from Love Actually and Nanny McPhee. I thought by now he'd be too old to play Klarion, but he's 20 and still looks like he did when he was a kid. So that's creepy in and of itself.

Laura Fraser as Shining Knight

I doubt most people would recognize Laura Fraser, but she was the blacksmith in A Knight's Tale and Lavinia in Julie Taymor's Titus. She's a fantastic actress who can be amazingly vulnerable and bad ass at the same time. To play a character that has fallen thousands of years through time and not make it seem cheesy could be a tough feat for any actor, but Fraser could pull it off in a heartbeat.

Donald Faison as Manhattan Guardian

For the most part, Donald Faison has really only ever done comedy, but he was great in Remember the Titans (which I will watch over and over again). And though this character deals with some dark shit, he seems to be rather joyous at heart. I think casting a serious, dark actor in this role could make this storyline too heavy and downtrodden, but someone like Faison could have fun with the role, and make this a great adventure story.

Carla Gugino as Bulleteer

Bulleteer is a great character in that she didn't ask to be a superhero. She was just a regular, albeit sexy lady minding her own business, and then BAM! metal skin. So she's still a regular person under all that. Carla Gugino has already worked her way into the nerdverse with her performances in Sin City and Watchmen, so she'd just slide right into this role. She can be tough, but vulnerable, and she's got the perfect look for it. And I'm sure a lot of people wouldn't mind watching her deck it out with some hottie teen superhero lady.


Chiwetel Ejiofor as Mister Miracle

Though I still don't know how to say his name, Chiwetel Ejiofor is awesome. He's been fantastic in everything I've seen him in. And this would be a really weird plotline to have to pull off. I'm still not sure if I understood it entirely. But I know it would require an amazingly talented actor who could sell every moment of crazy shit that's thrown our way, and he could totally do it.

Tom Hardy as Frankenstein

I'm super bummed that I didn't discover Tom Hardy until Inception, and there's so many movies he's been in that I'm dying to check out. And Frankenstein is a weird role. He's gotta be this superhero, but he's a monster, and he's all old-school Victorian. From what I saw in Inception, Hardy could bring this character to life, as well as give him a little style and flair. Cause you can't have boring zombie Frankenstein in Seven Soldiers. He's a badass Hellboy-esque force of nature. Plus, Tom Hardy could bring a little bit of prettiness to all that grossness.

Daryl Hannah as The Bride

This was a really interesting plot point to me. The idea that this woman was created as a bride for a monster, but didn't want that life, so she went off and did her own thing. That's such an interesting character. And the bit about her arms was super creepy. So to cast her, I was trying to think of tall, strong ladies who could hold their own against a giant zombie man, and Daryl Hannah popped right up. I probably love her the most in Steel Magnolias, but in Kill Bill, she proved that she's downright kick ass. And she could totally pull off this crazy costume.

Alan Cummings as Melmoth

Melmoth was a really interesting character to me as well, and it seemed he needed someone who has quite a bit of flair, and so Alan Cummings would fit right in. He's absolutely fabulous and fantastic at being crazy and over the top, and he can pull off creepy while being totally watchable.

Parker Posey as the Sheeda Queen

So then who better to play Melmoth's estranged wife than Parker Posey. Time and time again she's played crazy SO well. It's kind of unbelievable. Plus, this would be a reunion for her and Cummings, as they were both fantastic in Josie and the Pussycats (which if you haven't seen it, you REALLY should). This is another character that if you cast a super serious actress in this role, it could get a little dry, so Posey would bring a great light to her. It would be kinda fun to watch her get kicked to the curb.

So yeah, there are a lot more characters that could be cast, but I figured I should stick with the ones that resonated with me the most.

Nerd Craftiness!

It's been like 3 months since I posted, and I didn't really realize that. But anywho, I made a lot of crafty things over the summer and I think they're pretty rad. I got into a t-shirt making kick using this foil-screen printing stuff I got at Michael's and these awesome patterns from Zombie Pumpkins (check them out!).

The one above is my rainbow Frankenstein monster, and it's definitely one of my favorites. More monsters should be rainbowized, I think.
I made this Batman shirt with just a standard Batman logo. This process of applying this foil stuff makes it go on kinda sporadically, which I think is cool, so I wanted to make it really extreme in this case. I purposefully made it fade into the center, like it was old and weathered, and I'm super happy with the results.
It's Wario! I've discovered the gold foil seems to work the best, so in trying to figure out what designs would look awesome in gold, I stumbled upon Wario.
I found the Beetlejuice snake design on Zombie Pumpkins and I totally lost my shit. I really, really wish I had a lime green foil to have made this in, but whatever. It's still totally rad.
And my Animal shirt is from now on my party shirt. For obvious and dorky reasons.
Robin hoodie! I've had a Robin 'R' patch FOREVER and I've never known what to do with it. Then a few months ago, I saw a Robin hoodie on Etsy and it was brilliant. I'd been looking for a plain red hoodie ever since, and I finally found one, so I sewed the patch on and painted my striped, and I'm totally ready to fight crime. Or take a nap.
I get on Shrinky Dink kicks every so often, and this is one of my more successful ones. I want to make a lot more of these necklaces in a variety of colors and words to match every occasion.

I've still got a ton more craft things to make, so I'd better go get on that...

Accidental Casting is Kinda Annoying

So I post my various casting things on here for comics and whatnot, but I always end up doing the same thing for regular books as well. And for some reason, when I cast book characters in my head, they stick with me a lot longer than comic book castings.

I think this has to do with seeing a character and thinking of an actor that reminds me of them versus having no real image of a character and then assigning them an actor. It also takes me a lot longer to get through a book than a comic (even a whole series), so book characters live in my head a lot longer.

So what ends up happening is this actor lives in my head as this character, and no matter what I do, that's always how I see them. And the more extreme the character, the worse the effect.
I bring this up now because I've been reading a book with a very extreme character and I cast her as Lizzy Caplan in my head, and it's ruining so many things for me. The book is "Like Being Killed" by Ellen Miller, and I guess it was a big deal in the late 90's. But it's about Illyana, this very smart, semi-antisocial, slightly damaged, Jewish 20-something, who gets a new roommate, Susannah (whom I saw as Alison Pill for some reason) and she's light and fun and crafty and delightful and kinda rocks Illyana's world.
Anywho, things go bad with Susie which causes Illyana to basically goes off on this drug-fueled, S&M spattered, willed self-destruction. It's all very smartly and beautifully written, which makes it all the more powerful and haunting.

I had brought the book with me on a trip to Texas a couple of weeks ago, and because of massive flight delays, I ended up reading half of it in a day. So by the time I got home, Lizzy Caplan WAS Illyana to me, and I was right in the middle of Party Down and True Blood Season 1, both of which she was on. And it's crazy because, I swear, Lizzy Caplan's speech patterns (especially on Party Down), match this character's exactly. EXACTLY. So the whole time I'm watching her and in the back of my head I'm remembering all the terrible things I've read her go through.

Alison Pill as Susannah has so far been less terrifying, but I'm getting to a point in the book where things have changed, so I'm hoping she will be okay, or else Scott Pilgrim might be a little dampened.

There are times where I actively try to avoid this from happening, like with "Hater," which I'm very happy I didn't cast anyone in that book, both because I know the movie is coming, and also it was more disturbing than I had originally thought. I've got the sequel on order and am about to re-read it, so I really have to fight the urge now.

It's such a weird thing that goes on in my head.

Some Science and Philisophy Shit...

I know no one comes here to read actual thoughts and opinions, but bear with me for a little science/philosophy/sci-fi nonsense..

I was watching a Yale university lecture on Death, and more specifically, the origins of a theorized soul. The professor was talking about how a soul is something that would be immaterial, unable to be measured, seen or felt. The argument was that, if this were the case, it could continue living on after the death of the body. This made me think about the Higgs boson particle that scientists are trying to find at CERN via the Large Hadron Collider.

The general idea behind the Higgs boson, to my understanding, is that it is smallest particle in existence, that it's literally the shit holding every atom in the universe together. Because of this, it's referred to as the 'God particle,' and it's possible that it might be immeasurable, and all the work put into finding it could be for naught. This is all really interesting to me cause I'm a huge dork and probably should've been an engineer like my dad wanted, but whatever.

Anywho, the thought I had last night was, what if the Higgs boson particle is the thing that gives us a soul? Or it is our soul? Maybe every object in the universe has a little force like this and they just function in different ways. I'm not really going to expand on that, just let it roll around in your head for awhile.

My second thought was, what if, at CERN, when they're shooting particles towards each other at a bajillion miles per second, they get a hit and find the Higgs boson? And then, by releasing it, they unleash a soul....And then it goes crazy and fucking swallows the world whole. But in a much more angry and vicious way than just a regular black hole like people are expecting.

So yeah. Those were my fancy Wednesday night thoughts.

Re-Casting: First Wives Club

So Hollywood seems to have run out of ideas and is currently remaking every movie ever made. It's obnoxious when they remake a great movie and make it mediocre or even crappy, but I'm all for taking mediocre or crappy movies and making them awesome.

I recently re-watched The First Wives Club with the magic of my Netflix Instant Queue and it is so not as great as I thought it was back in middle school when I would watch it repeatedly on HBO. However, there was potential for greatness: the cast was awesome, the plot starts out pretty dark, but then it gets loaded with cheese and becomes all sappy. I think if it were to be re-made as a dark, black comedy, it could pretty awesome. Sassy, talented, older actresses taking real revenge on the husbands who screwed them over for younger women, with a little more violence and mischief--that could be hilarious!
Demi Moore as Elise Elliot

The actress in this role needs to still be sexy and viable but not as sought after as she once was, and Demi Moore would be perfect for that. She hit big in the 80's with Ghost and St. Elmo's Fire wife who's on Twitter all the time. But she's still super hot and super talented. I could definitely see her pull off getting tossed aside for a young , and stayed pretty popular throughout the 90's, but now she's more known as Ashton Kutcher'shottie and then seek revenge in a bad-ass fashion.
Elizabeth Perkins as Brenda Cushman

So this character needs to be both a loving mother and a little spitfire willing to blackmail her sleazy ex-husband. Elizabeth Perkins has played all types of roles, but the thing she is probably most known for and what I love her in is Weeds. In those first two seasons she is fantastic. She's hilarious. She's conniving but still very human and funny all at the same time. She's beautiful, but could still be dressed down and go through her 'butterfly' transformation to kick some ass at the end of the film.
Toni Collette as Annie Paradis

This is role of the nerd. The mousy one who is afraid to do anything at all. She's super neurotic and over-analyzes everything which is why Diane Keaton was such a perfect choice for the role. Toni Collette has played all sorts of roles (I think my favorite is as Brian Slade's super-fake wife in Velvet Goldmine) so I think she can do anything. She too is beautiful but not in such a striking fashion that you'd disbelieve she could be a dork. She has to be both the straight man but be able to get in a few laughs, and I believe she just one an Emmy for her role in The United States of Tara, so there you go.
Tim Roth as Bill Achtison

And now for the husbands. This is the scummy Hollywood husband who is both charming and icky at the same time. And there isn't anything Tim Roth can't do, so I think he's perfect. Plus he's handsome in an unconventional way and you could totally see some young actress trying to sleep her way through him to become famous.
Nick Offerman as Morton Cushman

I knew nothing of Nick Offerman before Parks and Rec, but now Ron Swanson is one of my favorite characters of all time. It turns out he's younger than I thought, but whatevs, I'd love to see him as a dry, money-hungry, recently turned sugar daddy. Plus for some reason, I think he and Elizabeth Perkins would have great chemistry together.
Dylan Moran as Aaron Paradis

This husband is an intellectual but not quite as nerdy as his female counterpart, but he's also just a little bit slick. Between Moran being the funniest part of Run Fatboy Run and his dry, cowardice in Shaun of the Dead, I think he'd be perfect for this role. Using psycho-analytical bullshit to comfort his wife while screwing the psychiatrist on the side, you'd hate him and love him at the same time.
Billie Piper as Shelly Stewart

This mistress has to be nouveau-riche--classy on the surface but the trashiness slips out every so often. I just got into Doctor Who and I loved Billie Piper as the sweet Rose Tyler, and I tried to watch Secret Diary of a Call Girl, but it's just too weird to watch her be all scandalous. But I think a role like this (somewhere in the middle of those two extremes) would suit her well. Kinda bitchy but still kinda sweet and funny. I could definitely believe she'd have a middle-aged man wrapped around her finger.
Leighton Meester as Phoebe LaVelle

I actually haven't seen Leighton Meester in anything except a lot of Gossip Girl commercials, but she seems to have that lolita-esque pouty thing down pat. This character needs to believably look 25 but actually be 16, and she seems to have that too (since I can't figure out how old she actually is). I could also see her striving to be like the Demi Moore character who would in turn hate her and just want her to go away.
Jessica Walter as Gunilla Garson Goldberg

This character needs to be a sassy old rich broad who's gone through multiple husbands and has no tolerance for shenanigans. And I just love Lucille Bluth and want to see Jessica Walter do more stuff stuff. So there.
Alan Tudyk as Duarto Feliz

Again, this is just another actor who I love and want to see in everything. However, his role in 28 Days as the oversexed, over the top, gay, German fellow was fantastic and I'd love to see him in more roles like that.

So yeah. Imagine all these people in a dark, comedic, revenge film. Imagine it's coming out next fall. It would be awesome, yes?

Birthday Bazinga Mix!

So this weekend is my birthday!! It actually falls on Easter, which happens every few years or so, but whatevs. I can deal. Anywho, instead of having a party or shin-dig, I decided to take a trip down to Baltimore with my Rickey. I used to live there when I was like 2 or 3 (acutally the above picture may have been taken there) and my Mom tells me it was pretty cool. But the thing is, it's gonna be a total of 8 hours of driving, so in addition to comedy albums and awesome CD's, I made myself a wicked cool birthday mix! I'm pretty proud of myself:

1. Goody Two Shoes-Adam Ant
2. I Have a Dreidel-Barenaked Ladies
3. Clint Eastwood-Gorillaz
4. Ooh La La-Goldfrapp
5. Come Out and Play-Richard Cheese
6. Telephone-Lady Gaga
7. Istanbul-They Might Be Giants
8. Seven Nation Army-The White Stripes
9. Intergalactic-Beastie Boys
10. Sleigh Ride-Barenaked Ladies
11. Home-Edward Sharpe & the Magnetic Zeros
12. Always-Erasure
13. Semi-Charmed Life-Third Eye Blind
14. Turning Japanese-The Vapors
15. Can't Stop-Red Hot Chili Peppers
16. Man in the Mirror-Michael Jackson
17. Slow Hands-Interpol
18. Any Way You Want It-Journey
19. Little Lion Man-Mumford & Sons
20. Drop It Like Its Hot-Snoop Dog ft. Pharrel
21. I Believe in a Thing Called Love-The Darkness

So yeah. It's rad. Drop me a line if you want me to send you the mix. I'll be partying it up in my little Honda. Word.

The Persuaders, and why advertising has doomed us all.

[This is one of those posts where I talk about things that actually matter to me. No one ever seems to read them, but if you're at all paranoid about the future of our country, please, have a gander.]

So last night I watched a Frontline special called 'The Persuaders' which was about how advertising and marketing work nowadays, since we've all been super saturated with media and ads. It was really interesting, but a lot of the advertising stuff was nothing new to me; I know that advertisers spend tons of money trying to get into our heads and figure out how to make us feel like we 'belong' to a brand and therefore will spend all our money on crap we don't need. That wasn't very surprising.

What I found most interesting came toward the end of the film, when it was revealed that politicians are starting to use the same methods as advertisers. This documentary was released in 2004, I believe before Bush was re-elected, and I'd really love to see a follow up to it now, after Obama's brilliantly successful campaign in which he really did brand his administration and sell the shit out of it. But I digress...

There's this super crazy company that works for advertisers called Acxiom, and what they do is work with banks and credit card companies and all sort of other entities to gather information on each of us: what we buy, what we like, where we are in life, etc. They then sell that information to advertisers so that they can narrow-cast advertisements to us (think Minority Report with the crazy eyeball scanning thing). Apparently politicians are starting to use companies like this as well. On the one hand, this a good thing. A candidate can find the people who are more likely to vote for them and send specified messages to voters as opposed to just talking in broad strokes to everyone and not really clicking with anyone.

However, the downside to this is something that really concerns me and I think speaks volumes to our current political climate. By breaking people down into little groups, and only talking about what matters to them, you run the risk of segregating the entire nation to the point where no one can agree on anything. Here's an excerpt of the transcript that really lays this out:

STUART EWEN, Hunter College: When you start sending messages which appeal to sort of, you know, white people in pick-up trucks, and then you're also sending messages to black people in Cleveland, and it's a qualitatively different kind of message, you're really trying to stir – or you're really trying to appeal to those aspects of people which sees themselves as different from each other.

PETER SWIRE: Instead of being Americans, we're sliced into 70 demographic groups. We might be sliced into hundreds of subcategories under that. And then the worry is that we don't share anything as a people.

STUART EWEN: The result is living in a society where people, rather than having an idea of the common good, increasingly see their own personal well-being or their own community's or ethnicity's well-being as the essential issue of democracy.

The film of course ends on a message of hope and how the savvier the consumers are, the better everything will be and blah blah blah. I think people are getting smarter about buying stuff (most people anyways), but the thing that really concerns me is treating politics like advertising. People don't pay attention to the government as it is, and if some politician is able to sell themselves like an iPod even though they may be corrupt and have terrible and damaging policies, we're screwed. I really worry that people are paying less and less attention to anything but themselves, and that's not going to get us anywhere but doomed.